June 1, 2010

Worried

I am in a WEIRD mental headspace right now. I can't talk about it without crying, and damnit if I didn't get teary at work today. I'm not going to say more about it than this, but it's been a harrowing weekend. I drove over 500 miles in less than 36 hours. I slept for about 1 hour on Saturday night, in a chair. My brain and heart are all conflicted and I don't know what I want to do about it. Everything will be okay, but it's very very scary when you think you might lose someone you love. And I'm not sure what's worse really, the idea of losing them to death or the idea that they may never figure out how to be a part of my life again. More or less the same thing. I have things to look forward too, but I can't bring myself to be quite as excited about them as I was before Saturday. I am conflicted.

So I'm going to try very hard not to get overwhelmed and overanalyze everything and just take it one day at a time.

Hug your family, call your friends, invite someone over, tell someone you love them. Life is too short.

1 comment:

  1. Lots and lots of hugs to you lady. I'm out all this weekend but would like to see you next week maybe? We still need to see that movie...

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